When the Son Frees You: A Catholic Man's Journey of Healing From Same-Sex Attraction by A. J. Benjamin

Author:A. J. Benjamin [Benjamin, A. J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: TAN Books
Published: 2020-02-28T06:00:00+00:00

“Totus Tuus, Maria!”

One night, I had a pretty intense dream. I was in a room with a bunch of women who were singing the praises of abortion on demand. As they became more and more vocal, I felt convicted to tell these women that they were killing human beings through their “choices.”

Obviously, they did not like what I had to say, and they turned on me in the dream, screaming at me. As their levels of anger rose, I began to feel physically threatened. All of a sudden, from behind me, I felt Our Lady enter the room. I never saw her, but I felt her presence. She came up from behind me and dropped her mantle over me. As her mantle fell, I felt her embrace me from behind and I was enveloped in a sense of peace and joy as I fell back into her arms.

As I was falling backwards, she whispered in my ear, “God is very pleased with you.”

Then, I woke up, and although I knew it was a dream, there was a real spiritual quality about it and that sense of peace stayed with me throughout the next day to the point that I would become so overcome with emotion during the day that I would just break down weeping.

I am not sure why I had this particular dream at this particular time in my life. I wasn’t really involved in anything specifically having to do with the pro-life movement, but as I meditated on it further, I came to realize that I have always been under Our Lady’s patronage. Indeed, the Mother of God has always taken me as her own and I knew that I would one day be at the forefront of the fight for the culture of life.

I remember attending prayer meetings where complete strangers would come up to me and tell me that they saw Our Lady with me or that they could feel her protection around me. I can affirm that this is true based on my own experiences in my life, at Fatima, even here in my dreams. There were just so many kisses from her throughout my life.

When I have shared my struggles with my sexuality with people and I tell them how deeply seated my desires were, they often ask, “Why didn’t you ever succumb to them?”

The only answer I can offer is that I am under what I like to call the “Immaculate Protection.” I owe it to none other than Jesus Christ with the special intercession of his Mother. It is no strength on my part at all; of that I am convinced.

So, since Our Lady seemed to have taken me for her own and placed me under her protection, it seemed only logical that I should formally offer myself to her. It was time to offer a kiss back to her. Not just a kiss, but my whole life, which she herself had ransomed for me in the name of Jesus Christ. Indeed, I would be nothing and nowhere without her.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.